“So. The world hates you. You are considered the worst thing to be compared to. Throw like a girl. Talk like a girl. Cry like a girl. God forbid we ever be girls.”
This post has been floating around the internet this week. (Warning – adult language.) For those of you who didn’t click through in fear of four letter words I’ll tell you that it’s a letter a woman wrote to her daughter that’s basically about how the world hates her because she’s a girl, but she shouldn’t worry about that because the world is stupid. I enjoyed it and agreed with a lot in part because, except for some details, it could’ve been about my niece who doesn’t fit into any stereotypes.
I’ve seen one criticism of the post but I’m sure there are others out there because this is the internet and we argue over self-evident truths, such whether or not Community is the best comedy on TV right now. (But even as I type that I think of Parks & Recreation and I start to doubt Community. The internet can even make me argue with myself!)
Anyway, the criticism I saw seemed to take umbrage with the fact that the author of the original post told her daughter that the world hates her because she’s a girl. The critic had examples of how her little girl is loved by her father and her brother and her grandfathers, so clearly it’s wrong to say the world hates her.
I think the critic may be missing the point. My nieces couldn’t be loved more by their male family members, but the World hates them. I know it hates them because it tries to limit who they are and make them feel worthless about themselves if they don’t meet certain arbitrary criteria. A World that loved my nieces wouldn’t think to criticize one of them for her unique interests, or if she didn’t have the body the World thought was ideal, or if she didn’t act the way the World thinks she should. No, I think it’s pretty obvious my nieces are not loved by this World.
I agree with the author of the original post that there’s no arguing with the huge majority of the World that doesn’t like girls and that the only way to change any minds is to do what you want to do and to do it with intention. Or, as the author says, “By not taking their s—.” I don’t think I will use that exact phrasing when I talk to my nieces about this issue, but I’ll sure be thinking it. Or maybe I will use that phrasing and the three of us will just make a pact not to tell their mom.
And seriously, this quote is my oldest niece:
“So they hate you. But f— ‘em. Because you are a force of nature, a powerhouse of emotion and talent and stubbornness and potential. You’re worth a billion of them.”